4 You Say Tomahto and I Say You’re Dead Page 2

  Maureen bent and kissed him on the forehead. "We know that, dear." She turned and pulled up a chair. Spaz sat. "You two visit. Ollie and I need a cup of coffee. Can we get you anything, Evie?"

  Spaz blinked. She shook her head. Maureen linked her arm with Ollie. "Then we will see you later, bye." They turned and left.

  Bean smiled at Spaz. She continued to stare at the closed door. Bean reached over and touched her hand. Spaz jumped. "What! I mean, what?"

  "You okay?"

  "Yeah. Is your mom always like that?"

  "Like what?"

  Spaz stared at him like he was from outer space. "Never mind."

  "What?"

  "No wonder you're the way you are. Is she for real?"

  "About as real as they come. Don't let her fool you. She can kick ass with the best of them."

  "Yeah, like Bambi whoopin' up on Thumper, right?"

  "Uh, not exactly. More like a smiling Doberman. You think everything is okay, but when you turn to leave she bites you in the butt."

  Bean laughed. Spaz laughed with him. A look of pain crossed his face. He grabbed his chest. "Ow, damn. Not really, ow—but she's got a mean streak a mile wide. Just, uh, ask her students. Those big bad jock straps whimper when she walks into class."

  "You lie."

  "I never lie."

  The sound of large feet slapping on the tile floor outside the door made them both turn. A quiet knock sounded, followed by a quiet, "Mrs. O'Sullivan?"

  Bean's eyes twinkled. He whispered, "Watch this." He smiled at Spaz and held a finger to his lips. "Uh, Mrs. O'Sullivan is not here."

  "Thank God. Go on, Tank. Get in there."

  Spaz smiled when she heard someone else say, "Yo dude, just drop the flowers and let's beat feet before she comes back."

  "You wimpin' out on us, Punt? Just shut up. We lost the bet so we gotta pay up. Lean Mean Maureen ain't even here, so we're safe. Come on, let's do it."

  Two sharp knocks on the door and it swung in. Spaz stood looking at the three biggest monster men she'd ever seen. Bean grinned from ear to ear. "Hey, guys."

  The one in front looked around the room. "Hey, Ryan, we brought you these."

  He held out his hand and Bean took the smashed flowers. "Thank you very much. You guys didn't have to come all the way up here."

  The second beast held out a crumpled card. "We wanted to make sure you were okay. I mean, you're one stand-up dude, man. I mean, you took one for a friend."

  "You're a kick-ass sonofabitch, man."

  "Dude, you are . . . Chuck Norris!"

  The other guys nodded and mumbled. Bean turned pink. "Thanks, guys. I'm glad you came up. My mom should be back in a minute if you want to wait—"

  They began backing up. "Naw, man, no. We gotta bail before the Wicked Buh-Witch of the West comes back—"

  "Come on, guys, she's not that bad."

  "What are you smokin', Boy Wonder? Your momma is one scary-assed bitch."

  Bean shrugged. "I guess she has her moments."

  A quiet voice from the hall drifted over the stunned crowd. "Did I hear my name? Oh, hello, boys. How nice of you to come up." Maureen and Ollie stepped around the beasts into the room. "I forgot my wallet." She walked to her chair and picked up her small black wallet. She sent Spaz and Bean a secret smile.

  The beasts huddled inside the door. "Aw crap, now we're screwed."

  "Fubar."

  "Train wreck."

  "Shut up, Elmore."

  "Stick a fork in it."

  Bean spoke up. "Mom, the guys brought me flowers and a card." Maureen stepped forward. The guys shuffled back. Maureen smiled a sly little smile and stepped closer. They stepped back again. Maureen leaned forward. They leaned back. She leaned back and they straightened.

  "Thank you for coming up, gentlemen."

  The beast named Tank tried to get out the door. "That's okay, Ms. O. We just wanted to tell Ryan he did a good thing even though he got shot. It's an awesome dude who'd take a bullet protecting a friend."

  They looked at Spaz. She ducked her head. "Yeah, I'm the one he got shot over."

  Tank grabbed her hand and about shook her arm off. "You must be a hell of a chick, Dude-ette. Most guys wouldn't do what Ryan did."

  Spaz pulled her hand out of the crushing grip. "You mean most guys with a brain."

  They all chuckled and Maureen cleared her throat.

  They scrambled for footing. Tank patted Bean on the head. They fell over each other trying to be the first one out the door.

  "Oh, boys?"

  The group froze. They slowly turned back.

  "Don't forget the quiz on heavy metals tomorrow. This little visit will not guarantee you an 'A'."

  Someone in the back groaned. Tank looked at his watch. "Oh look. Time to go. I gotta be over at the tomato farm before noon. Two workers quit or something, so I got a lot of overtime. Plus, you'd think with the big boss in jail they'd have shut down even for a day. But nooo. Not the Hunnicuts. Business as usual, that's Big Frankie."

  They started backing out of the room. Spaz jumped in front of Tank.

  "Wait! Are you talking about I Say Tomato, You Say Tomahto, The hydroponic tomato farm on Highway P?"

  Bean looked confused. "Hydro what?"

  She shushed him "You're high, Bean. I'll tell you in a minute." She turned to Tank. "You work for Franklin Hunnicut? I didn't know he owned the tomato farm."

  Tank nodded. "Yeah, it's kind of weird growing tomatoes without using dirt, but yeah, I load trucks, keep inventory of the chemicals, kind of all around go-fer guy. But now I gotta answer phones and run the farmer's market once a week."

  Spaz smiled a slow, sexy smile that made the big guy gulp. She stepped close to him. "I always wanted to see how growing tomatoes in water worked. Think maybe sometime you could . . . " she blinked slowly, "show me around?"

  Bean cleared his throat. Spaz ignored him. She gently laid a hand on Tank's arm. He turned red. He ran a hand over his face. "Hell yeah! I-I mean sure, any time."

  Someone shoved a pen and a ripped napkin forward. Tank grabbed them and Spaz scribbled her cell phone number on the napkin. "Thanks, Tank. Bye now."

  The boys nodded and tumbled into the hall. They sounded like a thundering herd heading for the elevators.

  Maureen smiled. "I saw them pile out of the elevators and head this way. My, my. The things one learns about oneself when eaves dropping on her students. One of them likes me—I'll have to work on that." Maureen and Ollie laughed like schoolgirls and left.

  Chapter 4

  The door closed and Bean jumped all over Spaz. "Just what were you thinking, giving that idiot your number?"

  Spaz shrugged. "I'll give my number to anyone I want to. It's none of your business, Bean Head."

  "It is if you're going off to check out the tomato place for clues to a murder."

  She held a hand up. "Stop it. Now. Just shut up a minute. I'm not going to get in trouble, or get hurt. I just think we need to run this by the others , that's all."

  "Promise?"

  "Promise. Cross my heart and hope to—"

  He grabbed her arm. "Don't say it."

  She took his hand. "Okay. Hey, I wonder what Ollie and your Mom are up to."

  Bean smiled and ran a thumb over her knuckles. Spaz jumped and Bean ignored her. "I don't know. You know, I think Ollie reminds Mom of Grandma O'Connor. She died last fall. So it's like getting motherly advice from someone who understands where you're coming from. Get it?"

  Spaz was thoughtful. "Yeah, I do get it. I get it 'cuz I always pretended I had a mom like Ollie who would talk to me, and hug me, and hang my art on the fridge like my friends. Ollie has filled that need."

  "Oh, was that your finger painting I saw on her fridge?"

  "Shut up, moron. You know what I mean." She smiled and she squeezed his hand.

  "I know." They were both quiet for a moment. Bean cleared his throat. "Hey, does this mean we're friends yet?" He batted his eyes and smiled like some go
ofy freak.

  Spaz dropped his hand. "Don't press your luck, Bean Dip."

  Bean sighed and turned his head.

  Oops, I must have hurt his feelings. Spaz felt rotten. "Yo, Beaner. Are you for real? Of course we're friends, you idiot. I was just kidding, man. What you did—you jumped in front of a bullet for cripes sake! Don't be a—"

  Bean smiled. "A dumbass?"

  "Yeah, a dumbass!"

  The door opened. "Someone calling Bean's name?"

  Bean closed his eyes. "Oh no. Not you guys."

  Pone, Shroom, and Cash piled into the small room.

  Cash bowed. "Oh-lah, Oh-A-nus A-mee-gus!"

  Shroom cocked his head. He smiled at Cash, which scared everyone. Shroom suddenly laughed out loud. "Did you really just say, 'Hi, butt-hole friend'?" He looked at Bean. "I like it. It fits you."

  Bean rolled his eyes. "It fits you more."

  Spaz giggled. "I think it fits all of you! Now get over here before Ollie gets back. I have a plan, and we all need to be up to speed."

  Shroom folded his arms. "I ain't dressin' up like no waiter." He looked at Bean "Or no girl."

  Bean shrugged and smiled. "Whatever, man. My auto-drugs just kicked in. I'm cool."

  Spaz signaled for them to gather close. "Come here, guys. I think I might have something to check out. Our best friend, Franklin Hunnicut, owns I Say Tomato, You Say Tomahto, the hydroponic—"

  All three boys stared at her and said together, "Hydro what-ic?"

  "Ponic, said like 'upon', without the 'up'. Hydro, as in water."

  Bean spoke up, a little blurry around the edges, as his drugs kicked in. "Hydroponic is the new way to raise some vegetables. Tomatoes work well, as do lettuces, radishes, and some other veggies. The roots of the plants are in water, not soil. The water flows past the roots and the plants suck up the nutrients. Nutrients are added to the water, and the same water can be used over and over. The fruits are the same size, less bugs, more produce-the best of all worlds. Some types of systems—"

  Spaz put her hand over his mouth to shut him up. Bean kept talking. Shroom did a fake snore, and Pone took notes. Spaz looked at Cash, who was picking at the mangled flowers. "Cash, are you with us over here? You can join in any time, you know." She looked over the group. "We ain't much, but we're all we have. Just think, a few weeks ago we couldn't stand to be in the same room together. Now, we're having a clan meeting over Beaner's passed out body."

  Bean lay quietly, his mouth moving, but no sound coming out.

  Cash looked thoughtful. "I worked at the tomato farm one summer. My dad thought a job would man me up. Val got me the job. I had a beef with the manager, Chuck Hart. We about went at it. Just about everyone there hated me—"

  Shroom looked at the others. "And ya wonder why."

  Cash shoved him and Shroom smiled. Cash leaned over Bean's feet. "I'm just sayin' I pretty much know how the system works. Hunnicut actually uses the mist 'areo' kind of hydroponics. Instead of water flowing past the roots, a sprayer mists the roots. It's the same thing, only it uses less water. I was just waiting for Bean to run out of steam."

  They all looked at Bean, who was passed out sitting up in bed. He still mumbled about hydroponics. The purple beanie was shoved aside and purple tufts stuck out above his ears.

  Shroom shook his head. "Man, that is just wrong."

  "Hurry up now. We have a lot to discuss before Ollie and Bean's mom come back."

  Pone stopped writing. "Hey, if Tank has to make up for workers who quit, can't we get in with the manager and one of us get a job there?"

  They all looked at Cash. He shook his head. "I don't think so, guys. Fred Becker, the manager there probably won't take me back. Last time I saw him I called him a sorry son-of-a- bitch and he called me a spoiled pain in the ass."

  "That's 'cuz you are a spoiled pain in the ass." Bean, zoned to the max, smiled.

  Shroom brightened. "Great! You, me, and Pone will all go over there. Fred Becker will take one look at you and hire us on the spot."

  The meeting broke up just as Ollie came through the door.

  That night at group Dr. Browning sat back and listened to what the boys were not saying. Spaz folded her arms and said nothing. That was not unusual, but Spaz faced the group and not the wall. Now that was unusual. She also smiled as if she had a secret. Dr. Browning thought they had been making headway, but if Evie was cutting again, she would have to report it. She scribbled on her legal pad and made a mental note to talk to Ollie. These guys were definitely up to something. What it was, Dr. Browning had no clue, but she was going to find out.

  Chapter 5

  Shroom borrowed his mother's car, and Cash left his truck at her house in case she needed a vehicle. The old station wagon fit them all comfortably. Pone bogarted one of Big Mike's surveillance duffel bags. Shroom, Cash, and Pone all wore wires. Spaz set up the station wagon with a recorder and a laptop.

  Walking in the door, the four of them looked around the room. They headed for the door marked "Office." A woman behind a desk looked up when they walked in.

  "May I help you?"

  Shroom took off his hat and stepped up to the desk. "Yes you may. I understand you are short help and we would like to fill in until your help returns to work."

  She eyed Shroom. "Who says we're short?"

  "One of your employees. We know Tank, and he mentioned he might be working some OT because a couple people didn't show up for work. I can load trucks, I can pack, pick, and do whatever."

  She looked at Pone. "And you?"

  Pone smiled and gave her an innocent look. "Well ma'am, I am good with plants. For the last few months I have been working in a greenhouse. I also have a background in chemicals—I mean chemistry.

  She looked at Cash. "And you?"

  "I have to be honest. I worked here last summer, but I had a falling out with—"

  "Fred Becker."

  All their mouths hung open, and the woman laughed. "I guess you didn't know he got fired over that incident."

  Cash snapped mouth closed. "No ma'am, I did not."

  "Yup. I got his job." She smiled for the first time. "So I figure I owe you a favor. I'd have sat in the second seat forever if you hadn't gotten into a pissin' match with Becker the Pecker. I'll take you all on, just let me get the paperwork filled out."

  Spaz smiled from behind Shroom. "Wow. Was that easy or what? I wonder what her name is."

  Just then, the woman poked her head into the office. "By the way, my name is Kayla Billings. I'll be back in a minute." She looked at Spaz. "Love your shoes."

  Spaz looked at her feet. She was wearing her pink Chucks with black skulls. "Uh, thanks."

  They huddled by Pone. They went over the plan. Shroom scratched his head.

  "So what's the plan?"

  Spaz shoved him from behind. "What's up with you? Did Bean's stupid genes rub off on you? What do you mean what's the plan?" She snorted and pointed her thumb at Shroom. "Pone, you'd better tell Loser Deluxe what we're doing."

  Pone sighed. "Here it is. We watch, we listen, and we gather info. No going off on your own. No getting involved if something happens. No heroics. If any Hunnicuts are seen, get on your radio to the rest of us, and get out. Don't wait for anyone else. Get out." He looked at Cash. "That means Val."

  "But—"

  "But nothin'. Val's a Hunnicut. She might let it slip at supper or something."

  Shroom pointed. "Or dat Momma. She is one messed up bee-ach! She already seen me an' Pone, man. She'll probably call da cops on us right away. There's something not right with her, man."

  Cash said, "You may be right. I saw her paste Val across the mouth for nothing. She's mean if nothing else. A mean drunk."

  Shroom shook his head. "Drinkin' booze will mess you up. Make you hit your kids. Make you drink up the rent, make you beat you wife." He shook his head and quietly mumbled, "Make you run off with some skirt and leave your five kids homeless with no food and no money." He walked away from the group
and whispered "Bastard."

  Spaz sighed. "Wow."

  The rest of them didn't know what to say.

  Kayla burst through the door. She slapped paperwork on the counter. "Here you go. Just fill these out so I can make up a file for each of you and I'll get you started."

  The phone on her desk rang. She grabbed it. "You say Tomahto and I say hello. This is Kayla speaking. Oh hi Mrs. Phillips. Uh, Rose? Why no she hasn't. Yes, that makes eight days she has not shown up for work. No, Mr. Hunnicut is not in. But Mrs. Phillips, I don't see how talking to him would solve...No ma'am he has no direct contact with the employees. No Mrs. Phillips, I cannot give you the home number. I assure you, Mr. Hunnicut does not know where your daughter is."

  The four of them looked at each other and leaned closer.

  Kayla's voice became louder and the kids could see she was irritated. "Yes Mrs. Phillips, I left the messages for him. I really don't see why you think he would know anything—no ma'am, have you tried the police?"

  All four kids leaned forward. Kayla turned her back to them. "Calm down, ma'am. I know you are upset your daughter is missing. No, she has not shown up for work for over a week now."

  Kayla sighed and Shroom almost drooled. Pone ducked below the counter and squatted right behind her. "Okay, okay, I'll write it down again. Red tank, blue jeans, white Sketcher tennies. Got it. Okay, yes, I hope she turns up as well. You're welcome Mrs. Phillips. Uh huh, you too. Bye now."

  Kayla hung up the phone and turned. Shroom jumped forward and grinned like a guilty idiot. "So uh, like where do I sign?"

  Kayla tried to see around him, but Shroom stuck his face in hers. He dipped and swayed, following her line of vision. Kayla was pissed. She pushed against his shoulder. "Back off, Cobra Boy. Where'd the other guy go?"

  Pone crab walked until he got behind Spaz. He pulled a Pez dispenser out of his pocket and stood. "Ah hah! There it is. It must have bounced when it hit the carpet."

  Kayla ignored him. She rolled her eyes. Shroom giggled.

  Cash leaned toward Pone. He spoke out of the side of his mouth. "Pez?"

  Pone stuffed the dispenser in his pocket. "What's wrong with Pez?"